Thursday, August 29, 2013

Be Kind to Everyone Day



Ever wonder what all this focus on kindness is about? Well, let me introduce you to Sasia Regan-Hughes. This 25 year old Starshine is one of my life's greatest teachers. The daughter of my dear friends, who while living her dream life in New York City, passed away from unknown health complications, unexpectedly 2 years ago. I didn't get a chance to know her well during her life here, but I have developed a kinship with her since her passing. She has shown me (not me alone of course) signs, certainly meant for her family, letting them know that she is pure light and love and that she is here, guiding, loving, and embracing. The signs are all about tenderness, love, joy, creativity, imagination, charm, and absolutely...kindness. I am privileged to be a part of the synchronicity, one sign after another, all connecting together to illuminate a massive web of connectivity between all beings. It has influenced every aspect of my life, profoundly. I live more honestly. I am more present in my marriage, I see my husband clearly, accept him completely, and love him deeply. I can see my children through a broader lens, allowing them the room to become their authentic selves, I can see and love them on a soul level more easily. I'm not so burdened by the social pressures to follow, and be, and do, as convention commands. Because of this, I can love my children unconditionally, better than before. My love isn't related to how they perform, how they obey, how they behave, how their actions reflect upon me. I just love them, they are beautiful souls on their own journey and I am privileged to have been chosen to be their Mom. My family has become even more precious to me, the "life is short" cliche is a cliche for a reason. My parents are here, and healthy, and they are my life's root and I treasure them more than words can say. I can't imagine a world without them in it and I intend to wring out every moment and every memory I can in this life. My brother and my sister are an invaluable part of my journey, though the lessons I learn from them change and evolve as we do, so it's not easy to put my finger on it. My friendships are a light in my life. I have high expectations for my circle of family and friends, I give and expect in return, honesty and authenticity. I will not waste time with someone who can't be real with me. I will go to then ends of the earth for relationships that matter to me, and will protect those that I love fiercely, that's the Scorpio in me. The world around me has been re-enchanted, I feel like a child and a crone at once. The simple joys, butterflies and hummingbirds, rainbows, sunlight, trees and clover have come alive to me. The western washington, grey, expansive, clouds that used to feel oppressive and depressing to me feel like they are higher, the light shines through them and of course they bring about so much beauty, and a perfect climate for growth. In my work, I feel like I have been trusted by the universe. What a gift to be able to bear witness to the first breath...and sometimes the last. But the circle is evident to me and I don't fear the last breath or what follows because I have witnessed the arrival and the exit and it seems to me that we are all coming from and returning to the same place. What is there to fear, then? Birth is magic, life is rolling hills, and death is magic. No matter how short or how long. I have become more courageous in my expression, more willing to put myself out there. I began writing my book shortly after Sasia's memorial service, at which I read something that she had written to herself. "Remember you can manifest anything you want and it will come. You don't even have to know how what you want will come to be." And so I sat down at my little computer at my kitchen counter and created something out of my own mind, body, spirit, experience, and passion. It would not likely have been written without Sasia's love letter to herself. The pages I read from at her service are wrinkled from reference and reverence and close at hand in a little nook I keep for remembrance, of those I have loved who have passed.
Yesterday was "Be Kind to Everyone Day". A holiday in Kirkland in remembrance of Sasia. For me this year, it was a day of working in my yard (accepting the kindness of a dear friend who offered to help me with a big project) and contemplating living and dying as I was watching the cycle of life happening all around me in my yard. I was thinking about a recent birth I attended, that did not have the outcome that we all wish for, he passed away after only a few days. I was thinking about my Grandmother who just celebrated her 96th birthday. Life is just inexplicable. Flowers are opening and leaves are falling in the same moment, right now. Life begins and ends all around us all the time, what better way to spend whatever amount of time we are allowed, than being kind?

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